Dear Ke$ha (pronounced kesha...),

Do you or do you not live in a club somewhere in downtown L.A? 

You don't have to answer that, but you do, right?

Now that I have that out of the way.. We need to talk about something...

Baby seals..

How did you even know that baby seals existed living in a club?

 Did you Google "clubbing" and stumble upon the baby seal footage used in the video?

Be honest..

I just thought your list of priorities went as follows:

1. Booze

2. Clubbing

3. Glitter

4. More booze..

5. Bling

So, you can see that when I saw baby seals on your list of priorities, I was shocked and also a little proud of you for standing for something else besides drugs and alcohol. Good for you. I'm not sure how Canada will feel about this, but good for you.

Yours truly,

Lamb

PS. This video was shot in a backroom of a club, right?